Birthdays

Birthdays as a kid pretty much always sucked. For an introvert, being forced into the spotlight is not pleasant. There are people who feel the birthday boy/girl MUST be pushed into center of attention status and they MUST like it. Doesn't everyone? No, we don't all like it. For me, the ideal birthday would have been peace and quiet. Maybe doing something I want to do. A moratorium on arguments and yelling would have been ideal. But birthdays were designed with the exact opposite in mind. Noise, yelling, boisterous and mostly fake laughter. Funny stories with me as the brunt of some competitive put-downs, followed by forced laughter were the traditions.

Nowadays, birthdays tend to be great. The people I live with (my current family unit) respect and love me. They give me room and yet still embrace me. I don't know how they do that, but they do it right. I can only try to do the same with them.

But I still try to avoid the forced adulation. The birthday wishes from strangers and near strangers, and the office 'party' are the worst of this. That's why I try to keep the actual date to myself. Or at least, that's the best explanation I can offer. I'm not sure why, but I feel guilty about my birthday preferences.

ps. May 27 is NOT my birthday.